Change of Plans

Well, we are no longer planning a homebirth. We are sad about it, but our midwife will not continue our care...for a very good reason.

We are having twins.

That is right. I am not even joking. We just found out today at our ultrasound. We had a resident friend do one for us since we haven't had one yet.

All week, I have been wondering if there were two babies instead of one. I believe my spirit knew what my mind did not--the Lord was preparing me for this great news!



Here they are!!!

Our next step is to find a doctor who won't insist upon a c-section unless absolutely necessary. Thankfully, my midwife is going to be able to be my support during delivery and be my go-between for hospital staff as well as helping support me with breastfeeding them.

We appreciate your prayers!!!

The Provision

In the grand scheme of things, bunk beds are pretty low on the list. I must say, though, that we distinctly felt His provision for them yesterday.

I had done plenty of online research of several stores in the nearest city, and my conclusions were that if we were to buy metal bunkbeds, bunky boards, mattresses, and pay to have them delivered, we would spend at least $800.

I did not want metal bunk beds. I'm sure there isn't anything wrong with them, they just don't seem as sturdy as wooden ones. But, we certainly did not want to spend even $800 and certainly not for metal bunk beds.

I checked Craigslist. Most bunkbeds with used mattresses were going for $500. We didn't want used mattresses, but most folks wanted us to take the mattresses with the beds.

So, we went on our adventure yesterday morning. We were both dreading the idea of wandering from store to store and back again just comparing prices and trying to get a good deal. It just sounded exhausting. We went downtown first because we knew of three furniture stores we wanted to check out there. The first store we went to was closed. Closed on Saturday. Seriously?

As we were driving back around, we saw a store that wasn't even on our list--Bates Furniture. It was in an old building downtown and didn't look fancy. We get in, and the lady comes right up and asks what we're looking for.

"Bunk beds. We're just shopping around and trying to get an idea of what we want to buy."

She takes us to the back of the store, and shows us what she has in stock. The first picture she showed us was everything we wanted:

Twin/Full
Solid Wood
Ladder
Rail
Drawers Underneath
MATTRESSES INCLUDED

For $550.

That is right.

I am not even kidding.

$550.

They would also provide setup and delivery for $75.

This is awesome considering we don't own a truck and couldn't rent a U-Haul for less than $90. And we'd rather have people set them up that are used to setting them up!!!

We walked out of there so relieved that our task was OVER and we had saved so much money. At another store I had talked to, they would have been able to give us all the same stuff for--get this--$1200.

We paid HALF.

God is a provider, and I am thankful.

A Really Uninteresting Post

I don't really have anything interesting to say. I hope to contradict myself, but that would be surprising.

I feel time is flying pretty quickly. My kids are growing. My belly is growing...mostly with fat. No really. It's funny to me that anyone would assume there's a baby in there since it is only the size of a plum. My belly is sure a lot bigger than that! It doesn't really bother me, but I don't want to wear maternity clothes yet. It was exciting to wear them with Sam (which I didn't get to do until I was 20 weeks). I'm wearing maternity stuff today at 10 weeks...I also need to do laundry. I just don't enjoy the looks on people's faces when I tell them I'm still in my first trimester. The cashier at Wal-Mart thought for sure I was four months pregnant. Ha! My abs just aren't what they used to be. :)

I'm considering giving the potty a try with Lucy. She almost peed on it last night. By almost, I mean she stood up from it and peed on the floor. She started crawling out of her bed yesterday. I have never had this issue. Neither of my big kids did that. She is a monkey. She is so tiny too. It amazes me she did it. As a result, we are going to move her to a toddler bed soon and put the big kids in bunk beds. So, this weekend, we will be shopping for bunk beds. I was hoping for a twin/full combo. But DANG, bunk beds are not cheap! I also want sturdy wood ones instead of metal construction. It wouldn't be too bad if we didn't have to buy the mattresses too. I saw a few on Craigslist that looked appealing, but we're not super thrilled with buying used mattresses. Does that gross out anyone else? If you live in my area, do you have any good recommendations on places to buy them? I have looked at several stores online, and I've found a few things that I like, but it looks like the cheapest is going to be about $800 for everything. What I want to buy is about $1200 total, and I just can't stomach that! And it appears, most folks on Craigslist want you to take their mattresses too.

I am thankful my kids have places to sleep. And a roof. And food. And more toys than any of us want them to have. I'm such an American.

Helicopter Parenting

Pardon me, if you and I have had this conversation; it may be boring for you to read this.

There's a trend I (and some magazines I've read) have noticed among parents currently--helicopter parenting. It is hovering over your children while they play and constantly directing them, re-directing them, and micro-managing every activity in order to have a controlled environment. This also leads into organizing activities to entertain children. ALL DAY LONG.

These parents cannot have a phone conversation with another human being because they are too busy hovering. These parents cannot get anything done around the house because they are too busy controlling their child's every move. These parents find themselves at their wit's end because they don't have anything planned for their kids to do today, and they're running out of ideas!

Well, I tried to be this kind of parent because I felt guilty for not doing as much with my kids as "so-and-so" was doing with her kids. It didn't work for me. I have always enjoyed letting my kids play in their room with their toys uninterrupted. I get more accomplished that way! I also have noticed that my kids sense that I trust them to handle situations. Occasionally, one will run and tattle on the other one. If I don't feel that it is a severe situation, I will tell them to work it out. If I think they need a mediator, I will step in. I don't ignore them--not entirely, at least. I just don't think it is very easy to be a kid when a grown-up is constantly there bossing you around.

I boss my kids around enough outside of their play time. I have nothing against play groups or outings--hear me out--but I wonder why so many moms feel like they have to be involved in so many activities. I take my kids to the library, sometimes. :) I go over and we play at friend's houses, sometimes. I just don't know for sure that it is always best to constantly try to find a way to occupy them. Plus, your kids learn that they must be entertained in life. And we all know, as adults, entertaining yourself endlessly only leads to sin.

Isn't childhood about playing and make-believe?

My kids spend most of their awake time doing one of three things--playing pretend, coloring, and playing outside on their bikes or in the dirt. Isn't that what adults miss about childhood? Would you miss it if you knew that the entire time a parent would be correcting everything you did while you were trying to have fun?

Now, I will say this: I believe it is my job as a parent to lead my kids in a God-ward direction. I do not allow my children to have a life free of consequences--just the opposite. I hand out consequences all day. However, I don't feel it is my job to make my kid feel like he/she is inadequate at living life. I won't correct EVERYTHING they do. I won't try to protect EVERYTHING we own. I will allow my kids to fail--that is a consequence in and of itself.

I have heard the other extreme of this--free range kids. A lady in NY let her 8 yr old (approx.) ride the subway alone in NYC. That is just stupid. You certainly must not put your children in situations where great danger could befall them. They have been entrusted to us. You cannot deny parental responsibility--and we must not neglect our children.

I hope to be somewhere in the middle on this one. What about you?

A Round of Therapy for Everyone!

Well, not everyone. But two of my kids are going into therapy. Not psychological therapy--I'm sure they'll have a day for that when they're older, but hopefully not!

Sam has started physical therapy for his leg. He is still walking around like he has a cast on his leg. It is straight out. We've been doing exercises mainly to help him gain confidence. The therapist said he has the range of motion he needs, he just also needs a good dose of "I can do it!". He is very afraid of bending his leg too far, and so he fights against it. He did much better with the PT than he did with us. But, we still get to do his exercises with him three times a day. I am praying he gains this confidence soon and starts to walk and run normally.

Lucy is being scheduled for a developmental evaluation (because several of her gross motor milestones were a bit late) and a speech evaluation (because she is a little behind on her speech). This is the kind of thing I thought I would freak out about, but I am not. She is SO smart--she's a little mimic, and she understands all the commands I give her. I think her hearing is fine--she responds to me from another room even if she can't see me. It could be that she's just mellow like her dad, and she doesn't care too much about keeping up with brother and sister. Either way, the sooner she gets help, the better. If you wait until after age 3, it is less corrective and more compensatory.

I am 9 weeks today, and I am feeling pretty well. This has honestly been the least sick I've felt in any pregnancy. I have moments, but I've figured out how to manage them better and keep myself from getting there. I'm still pretty tired, but even that is not as bad this time. I am going to be very busy the next couple of weeks with appointments--I've got Sam's PT appointments, Lucy's appointments, and I have two risk assessment appointments and a midwife appointment.

I am getting the sewing bug. This is a good thing because I have a few projects I have yet to finish. I feel like a heel when I promise something and don't come through. Sorry, Christy, I really haven't forgotten your purse (and I'm actually having a fabric dilemma and may need to go shopping!!!). I have grand plans to sew. I don't have much free time to do it since I nap during naptime now. :) But, as my energy returns, I am sure I will be sewing more than I should.

Today, we are headed to the library because they are having Kindersongs today. I think the kids will enjoy it. Now, I must go brush my teeth!

You're Doing WHAT???

We are planning, Lord willing and if the creek don't rise, to have a home birth. :)

I am seeing a midwife who lives about an hour from me. She has attended the births of two of my friends. She has excellent stats--875 babies--never lost one. This lady knows when to transfer!!! I appreciate that kind of self-knowledge. She knows her limits.

My last birth lasted 4.5 hours start to finish. I'm hoping this one is as good. It was a good length. I had some great pre-labor pains that were irregular with Lucy that helped speed me along. Our nearest hospital has a crazy high intervention rate--60%. I am not entrusting myself to people who are more likely to cut me open than do anything else. Plus, I'm low-risk. If at any point we feel concerned, we will not hesitate to make other plans.

Some of you may be wondering if having a home birth is safe. Well, a doctor friend of ours who is involved in all kinds of research--Walt Larimore, M.D., spends his time writing and researching EVERYTHING--not excluding home birth. His blog is full of wonderful information: www.drwalt.com/blog. In a conversation with him about home delivery, he said, "The combo of a midwife and doula is (statistically) the safest way to go -- and the U.S. data on home deliveries looks pretty good."

In addition, I've done my own research and found that for low-risk women, homebirth has typically better outcomes and fewer interventions (forceps, vaccuum, induction, c-section, etc.). If you are looking for a good book to read on home birth, read Ina May's Guide to Childbirth by Ina May Gaskin, the nation's leading midwife.

If you're still skeptical, here are a couple of links with some great information:

Medical News Today

Midwifery Today

British Medical Journal (yes, it's British, but the study is concerning North American homebirths. This study is frequently cited in other works, I've noticed, and it is quite recent.)

Cast-Away

Sam gets his cast off today! I am so glad. I am ready for his leg to be clean.

He doesn't want it removed. I think he is scared. I tried to explain how it would come off. We shall see how he does when we get there.

I'm thinking we will have lunch at Chick-Fil-A.

I wish Dave didn't have to work today. His mini-vacay ended Tuesday.

We had a lovely weekend in KC. We ate great food, saw a movie, napped, went to a museum, and spent some quality time at the International House of Prayer. We are very refreshed.

We missed the kiddos, though. I think they missed us a little bit. :) I think Lucy missed us the most.

My brother is amazacrazy and fixed our drainage problems. Yea!!! We are hoping this means no more of me in the garage with the shop vac every time it rains.

My family watched the kids, and the adults survived. The kids survived too. :)

Yesterday was our 8-year anniversary. My husband encouraged me big-time in his awesome card fashioned with the Super 8 logo. We do traditional anniversary gifts, and this year is pottery/bronze. He bought me a ceramic pot from 1956 that was traditionally used for beans. I am going to use it for cookies. :) His gift has not arrived yet, but I will be sure to show it when it does.

Well, that's my update. Wish it could have been more exciting! Happy Thursday!